My new life motto - "Everything happens for a reason". Well not new but something that keeps implementing itself in my life more and more.
Last week felt like a dump truck emptied out on me. I'm tired, worn down, and just not happy with where I'm at. It doesn't help that we have a teething baby and are getting no sleep. It definitely toys with your emotions! We have been trying to improve our credit for the last 4 years and its still not good enough, I'm still not pregnant and we've been trying for almost a year, Matteo has been horribly fussy with teething and diaper rashes, Ryker has a cough that refuses to go away (all of my kids have dr's apts in the next two weeks), I'm trying to get into the doula thing but its not working the way I want it to, trying to figure out the adoption thing, counting down to find out if Zach made staff, figuring out the VP thing for my club, Jaidyn's birthday is in two weeks, and life is getting a bit overwhelming. Not to mention, keeping everyone happy.
What I have got out of that, is that there is a reason this is happening to me. Maybe to make me more grateful? More humble? Maybe we're not pregnant cause we need to adopt? Or maybe its just not the right time? Who knows but I do know there is a reason. Something better has to be out there for us.
We have some awesome friends who are going to let us rent-to-own their house which is a HUGE blessing. We are going to an adoption meeting next month and looking more into that. I applied for a job and hopefully will get it. Everything will work out and I have hope for this year to get better.
I have such a wonderful support system here. I don't know what I would do without my friends. Even the friends I've met at different bases or from back home. I have some amazing people in my life and I know I would not be sane without them!
Life will not get me down and I am making the best of every situation. I have awesome friends/family, wonderful children, a supportive husband, and a roof over my head. All in all, it is what YOU make it :)
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
A million miles a minute
Right now my brain is incredibly overwhelmed. Ok, maybe not overwhelmed but definitely going at a million miles a minute. There is so much going on in my life and so much I need to add to it.
I really need to get into the swing of going to school again. My doula program is insanely easy, I just need to set my mind to it and get it done! I want to do this. With all of my heart. I LOVE babies! I love the birthing process and I would love to be support to those going through that. I'm pretty sure anyone can tell how obsessed I am about anything pregnancy/baby/birth related. I LOVE it! I will get into it and I will finish this program. I also really want to do a home birth for my next baby so I'm hoping this will help me feel more confident.
The whole baby making thing is wearing me down. I had no problem getting pregnant the first 4 times. I know some may think its selfish of me to want another one, but my family is not done yet. Zach and I are both very passionate about adding to our clan. We both want a big family. For me, I feel like the one good thing I'm at in life is getting pregnant and its not happening this time. I've been checked and apparently I am perfectly fine. I work out 1-2 hours a day and I try to eat healthy. The dr thinks its from breastfeeding. I stopped about 2 months ago so hopefully everything will start to get back on track and we will be announcing some special news soon. :) We have been trying since September and it does drag you down. Trying to keep my mind busy with other things so I don't think about it. It doesn't help when you say you're sick or tired and everyone jumps the gun by saying you have to be pregnant. I wish!! I really do.
We currently live on base. That was not supposed to happen but that's a whole other story. Right now we are talking to people about moving in July. Our lease is up the beginning of August so we want to move out in July. It seems like forever away but its not to bad. I need more space and so do the kids. We're trying to get a home with land. We actually found one we love but hopefully it won't sell before we can get it :D
I am now officially the Vice President for our Combined Spouse's Club here. I am sooo excited about this and can't wait to get things started! This base has been amazing and I have been so incredibly blessed with some awesome people.
Jaidyn's school ends at the end of May. I can't believe he's almost done with pre-k!! He's all signed up for kindergarten and reminds me everyday how much he's grown. His FIFTH birthday is coming up soon too. Time flies!
Zach and I celebrate our 6th anniversary next month! Another thing that has flown by. I can not believe we've been married for just about 6 years. I still count down until he gets home. Every time he comes home, my heart feels like its going to burst with excitement. Its amazing how even when you're no longer newly weds, you can still feel so complete with each other and miss each other so much. No matter how long the time a part. I'm excited to see what year 6 will bring :)
I really need to get into the swing of going to school again. My doula program is insanely easy, I just need to set my mind to it and get it done! I want to do this. With all of my heart. I LOVE babies! I love the birthing process and I would love to be support to those going through that. I'm pretty sure anyone can tell how obsessed I am about anything pregnancy/baby/birth related. I LOVE it! I will get into it and I will finish this program. I also really want to do a home birth for my next baby so I'm hoping this will help me feel more confident.
The whole baby making thing is wearing me down. I had no problem getting pregnant the first 4 times. I know some may think its selfish of me to want another one, but my family is not done yet. Zach and I are both very passionate about adding to our clan. We both want a big family. For me, I feel like the one good thing I'm at in life is getting pregnant and its not happening this time. I've been checked and apparently I am perfectly fine. I work out 1-2 hours a day and I try to eat healthy. The dr thinks its from breastfeeding. I stopped about 2 months ago so hopefully everything will start to get back on track and we will be announcing some special news soon. :) We have been trying since September and it does drag you down. Trying to keep my mind busy with other things so I don't think about it. It doesn't help when you say you're sick or tired and everyone jumps the gun by saying you have to be pregnant. I wish!! I really do.
We currently live on base. That was not supposed to happen but that's a whole other story. Right now we are talking to people about moving in July. Our lease is up the beginning of August so we want to move out in July. It seems like forever away but its not to bad. I need more space and so do the kids. We're trying to get a home with land. We actually found one we love but hopefully it won't sell before we can get it :D
I am now officially the Vice President for our Combined Spouse's Club here. I am sooo excited about this and can't wait to get things started! This base has been amazing and I have been so incredibly blessed with some awesome people.
Jaidyn's school ends at the end of May. I can't believe he's almost done with pre-k!! He's all signed up for kindergarten and reminds me everyday how much he's grown. His FIFTH birthday is coming up soon too. Time flies!
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| Jaidyn - April 2012 |
Zach and I celebrate our 6th anniversary next month! Another thing that has flown by. I can not believe we've been married for just about 6 years. I still count down until he gets home. Every time he comes home, my heart feels like its going to burst with excitement. Its amazing how even when you're no longer newly weds, you can still feel so complete with each other and miss each other so much. No matter how long the time a part. I'm excited to see what year 6 will bring :)
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